Friday, April 11, 2008

If life weren't hectic enough...


I love checking the mail! Just the sight of that patriotic-colored mail truck makes my tummy feel all excited and stuff. Yeah, I'm weird like that. I bust at the seams with excitement at what could be lying in that box for us on any given day. Magazines? Money? A sweet letter from your little sister? (Thanks Bethany!) A college graduation invitation? (Way to go, Brad Day!) Junk mail? Bills? A letter from your utility company telling you that they have decided to give you a year's worth of electricity for free? (Hey, I like to daydream every once in a while.)

A summons for jury duty?

I have to admit that I cried when read it: "Amber Ferrell, you are hereby summoned to appear for jury service on May 5, 2008 at 8:45am." In my sleep-deprived, allergy-infested, somewhat stressed-out phase, this was the breaking point. I shot up a mini-prayer in desperation: "Not this too, Lord. Please no. I'm not capable of doing all of this. Help me."

A few minutes later, I read the glorious words that shone in the light and sang out with a most gorgeous voice: "Postponement or Excusal Request".

They didn't give me enough room to write everything in my excusal request, though. I wonder if they would mind if I took up all the front and the back of the page?

Postponement or Excusal Request:
1. I do not have enough crayons, coloring books, and candy to keep my children quiet for long enough as we all sit in the jury box.

2. My 4 year old likes to ask hundreds of questions a day that would more than likely prove to be a hindrance to the trial. Your robe and gavel would only exacerbate this problem. But if you don't mind the unending conversations, I am perfectly capable of tuning out her questions of why you are wearing a dress and banging that whack-a-mole thingy on your desk.

3. My 2 year old tells knock-knock jokes that make no sense whatsoever, but she is in that "you can not be cuter than you are right now" phase that will more than likely have the rest of the jurors paying attention to her instead of the bo-ho-ring lawyers and laughing at the adorable non-sense coming from her mouth. She also has to go potty at random times. Can we bring a potty chair? You know, cause I'm redneck like that and don't mind her doing her business in front of a court room of innocent strangers.

4. My littlest little one eats like a...well, like a baby who likes to eat a lot. I am not afraid to give the term "nursing in public" a whole new meaning. And if that is unacceptable, "pumping in public" should be a lot more fun.

5. Oh...no kids allowed? Well, I seemed to have pretty much exhausted all of my child care possibilities for the million or so, give or take a few, doctor's appointments we have had to attend. Could that kind lady over there who is doing a remarkable job typing out everything everyone says be so sweet to babysit my kiddos while we return back to business up in here?

6. I am very in favor of the death penalty. Tax evasion? Armed robbery? Delinquent parking tickets? Probation Violation? Fry 'em...fry 'em all.

7. Please please please please please don't make me do this. I might just go crazy in the process. Really. I'm not kidding here. And yes, that might just be a threat. Have you ever seen a crazy, sleep-deprived mama in the court room? It probably won't be purdy.

Now, let's just hope that those powers-at-be grant my request for an excusal.


- - - - - - - - - - - - -
**Nathan had his first physical therapy appointment this morning and it went so great. His physical therapist is so wonderful! We are going to start going every week (Tuesdays at 8:15am). I'll write more about it all next week...we have friends here right now, and I wrote this post last night, but I wanted to update it with his PT appointment info.

14 comments:

Other Mother on April 11, 2008 at 3:07 PM said...

You are absolutely hilarious, Amber. I can see it all, now!

I'm sure you won't hear another word from them when they get your response. ;-)

Amanda on April 11, 2008 at 9:29 PM said...

Too funny!! I am still laughing about the "pumping in public" scenario. I had a flash back to the two LONG months that I pumped and you are right, it wouldn't be purdy!!!

Hope they let you out of it.
So glad to hear Nate's 1st session went well and that you like the therapist. That makes a huge difference I'm sure!

Christine on April 11, 2008 at 9:35 PM said...

Soooo happy that the PT went well and you are now set with a schedule...and, if it's any consolation, I would definitely grant you excused from JD!!!!

Meg said...

You crack me up! Just FYI - the nursing thing will get you out of it...but you know that blank on the card that says "Please state the future date you will be able to serve"...they will call you on that very day to serve! I had to do it last Sept. Good luck! Glad to hear little Nate has a great PT!

mollie on April 11, 2008 at 10:30 PM said...

You should TOTALLY go, raise your hand and ask if if it is ok to pump. I bet people would be falling over each other to usher you out of the building. Quickly.
HAHA

momof2princesses on April 12, 2008 at 1:05 AM said...

I hope they let you out of the jury duty... Your excuses cracked me up!

I'm glad Nathan's PT went well!

Emily on April 12, 2008 at 8:23 AM said...

ROFL!!! Cant' you just picture it you and the kiddies sitting in there making ruckus. You'll be excused for sure.

oh amanda on April 12, 2008 at 8:43 AM said...

Oh, Amber! Please send that in as your excuse! Please! LOL!

So glad you like your PT. Can't wait to hear more.

Beth on April 12, 2008 at 8:48 AM said...

Amber,

I also got called up to serve last month. A lot of the same things played in my head. Yeah I have a 3 month old that eats every 2 hours and nope I don't think pumping in public is publicly acceptable.

Oh well, in our great state you can get off if you are the caregiver for children under the age of 4. I went and signed my paper and got off.

Wanna know what was funny? A week after I got off, they called Jay. So Monday morning at 8:45am he gets to go serve. Bless his heart!

Jill Chandler on April 12, 2008 at 10:48 AM said...

I'm confident you'll be excused from duty... My status as stay-at-home, home-schooling mom was basically an automatic pass for me here in our little neck of the woods.

I'm so excited that PT went well! :)

TracyVDM on April 12, 2008 at 7:20 PM said...

Hey Amber!

I'm not positive, but I think (around here, anyway) that being a breastfeeding mother can get you out of jury duty...something to look into, at least. :)

Kelly Spezzano on April 12, 2008 at 9:42 PM said...

Oh man, another great perk to having a newborn? Getting out of Jury duty!

Glad to hear Nate's first PT appointment went well. We've been in much prayer for you all!

The Princess on April 13, 2008 at 7:23 PM said...

Sorry we missed you guys at church today! We were at my friends' son's christening. I am thrilled to hear about the PT working out and also the stability of a schedule! Jury duty is a stinker, for sure! Jess always gave me great hints: "My sister works for the State Attorney's Office." and "I believe in Capital Punishment." Maybe yours would work better though!
Love you,
Ash

Danielle on April 14, 2008 at 7:10 PM said...

It took me forever to find your current blog... I lost you after the house. I am loving catching up. Totally with you on the Jury Duty & I don't think any of your excuses are bad ones!

miss you on the DB board!

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