Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Joy Unspeakable


Nathan slept through the night for the very first time last night and awoke as a smiley little guy at 7:00 this morning. It just keeps getting better! I woke up at 6:00am to check on him and then was just so excited to start the new day with a lighter load that I couldn't go back to sleep.

With the extreme heaviness of this burden lifted from our shoulders, it is almost as if we are walking on air. We have a new found "giddy-up" in our step. The smiles have not left our faces. And every few minutes, I feel the urge to lift my eyes toward heaven and just say "Thank you"...over and over and over again.

Oh, it was a good day. No, it was a great day. We danced around the living room and the girls and I twirled each other until we were so dizzy that all we could do was lay on the floor and watch the ceiling spin. We laughed. We smiled. All day long.

I held Nathan's sweet-smelling head against my chest numerous times and just rocked him back and forth. I talked to him about God's precious mercy and love, and Nate smiled from ear to ear. And for the first time in a while, I allowed myself to picture our son at different ages...his first birthday, his first steps, teaching him how to ride a tricycle, buying him a big boy bed, telling him to take his hat off during dinner. For the past few weeks, I have shaken my head free of these images, so it was so good to picture him in our family for many years to come.

I have wanted to climb on top of the house and shout "Great is the Lord and greatly to be praised!" But more than anything, there are no words available to describe the feeling of utter elation and extreme thankfulness. Everything I think or say just doesn't seem enough. It's too small for the magnitude the Lord has blessed us with.

I started running in the evenings a few weeks ago. I longed for some quiet time for prayer, and quiet is something that is rare during the day with three little ones. This time in the evenings was wonderful for my soul and body...I have immensely enjoyed my talks with God during these times. Tonight was an especially sweet time. I tried so desperately to convey my thankfulness to my Lord, but the words just couldn't fit together and all I could muster through tear-filled eyes was...

Thank you, Lord.

Thank you, Lord.

Thank you, Lord.

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Alright...Thanks to the musical montage, I am now completely, 100%, indubitably dehydrated! ;-) Love,
Dad
P.S. What a great day this has been! Soli Deo Gloria!

mollie on June 11, 2008 at 11:58 PM said...

I,too, said "thank you Lord" many times today. I was at work at the hospital and thought about you all day. I can't stop smiling about your little angel. I truly believe he is a miracle. An example of God's healing power. What a great day...love to you all!

April and Robert on June 12, 2008 at 12:05 AM said...

We continue to lift your precious family in prayer. Nathan has blessed all of our lives in his short life thus far. I know that God has big plans for your little man. What an honor and privilage to share that joy. May God continue to bless your lives. Also may you and your family remember the joy and peace it brings to see those beautiful "Gowens" smiles. All our love! April and Robert

Elaine A. on June 12, 2008 at 12:52 AM said...

Wow, that video made me cry! So sweet.

I just came over from Amanda's blog (although I have been here before) to read your wonderful, glorious news! The power of prayer is so awesome! I pray that Nathan continues to improve and that all your fears can be left behind.

Shout it from the rooftops - this is a time to rejoice!

Bloggy Mama on June 12, 2008 at 1:12 AM said...

Praise God!
What a great testimony to God's healing, mercy and grace. Praisr and honour to Him.
Blessings on you all,
~Elizabeth

Bernard Gowens on June 12, 2008 at 2:28 AM said...

Our Dear Grandchildren, Amber and Jay,

Praise the Lord for His abundant grace and mercy! We have cried and prayed very early each day and to late in the night for our Great Grandson, Nathan. God has surely heard our prayers and the prayers of His people and has granted a healing--Praise God !!
People were praying all through this land and country and holding up Nathan to the Lord begging for a deliverance to health and from the dread condition of SMA. Our Heavenly Father is so gracious, loving, and merciful to grant such a GREAT deliverance. Our prayers continue for God to grant our precious Nate good health through his life and may he grow strong in body, mind, faith, hope, and patience to wait on the Lord of Glory for all things needed for this life.
Nathan is truly God's precious GIFT from Heaven to his family and to all of us who love him so dearly. May God receive all the Glory, Honor, and Praise.
Our love always,
Granddaddy Bernard and Mimi Lynn Gowens, Friona, Texas

Jennifer on June 12, 2008 at 7:33 AM said...

oh my, ok now I'm crying again! Nathan you turn me into mush....you steal my heart:) God Bless your family...can't wait to see this little man grow up

oh amanda on June 12, 2008 at 8:11 AM said...

Indeed! Amber, I can't even imagine the joy that is overwhelming you guys! As soon as I read your post, I called my dh. Then when Lydia woke up I told her and she actually squealed! (I'm not sure she exactly remembered Nate, but still it was cute!)

I've just got that feeling inside that we are experiencing a miracle. I'm still praying that Nate's condition will be improved. That these two huge battles that you've been through will only be memories of how GREAT God is. And what a miracle God has done, is doing and WILL DO in Nate's life.

I'm sure I'm rambling, it's just b/c my heart is full! Love you guys!

Katie on June 12, 2008 at 8:36 AM said...

Amen, isn't He magnificent? I love how you described standing on the roof and shouting as being too small. Isn't that exactly the feeling? Praise You, Lord!

Chrissy Mae on June 12, 2008 at 10:15 AM said...

Amber, I am so glad that you can picture your angel in your family farther down the line. Enjoy these moments. I am so glad that Heavenly Father has brought your family through this. I will continue to pray for your family and for your son, that whatever may be ailing him will go away and that he will be a perfectly healthy boy. God Bless your family!

skye on June 12, 2008 at 10:54 AM said...

I've asked & told so many of friends and family to pray for you. I couldn't wait to tell them all the good news yesterday - I'm just so thrilled for your family!

Psalms 35:8-10
Oh, put God to the test and see how kind he is! See for yourself the way His mercies shower down on all who trust in Him. If you belong to the Lord, reverence Him; for everyone who does this has everything he needs.

Merrie on June 12, 2008 at 12:43 PM said...

Okay, you two should have twelve more babies, because you make the best looking kids! Great video -- such a lovely family. I'm still busy rejoicing over here in CA. God bless!!

~sydney~ on June 12, 2008 at 2:08 PM said...

Oh, Amber! What a blessing! You are such a beautiful person inside and out! I love the video, too! Your children are BEAUTIFUL and Baby Nathan will stay in our prayers! Love you!

PS-Way to go on the running! Next time I come, we'll need to go out for a jog! Keep it up!

Liz on June 12, 2008 at 2:31 PM said...

My heart is filled with joy for your family, Amber. God is great, powerful, loving and merciful. I've been following Nate's story from the beginning and found myself weeping and smiling through it all. Today, I find myself doing both...for very very good reasons. God Bless you all...

Jess said...

Oh the pictures ended too soon! I think I could look at your kids and photography all day, Amber! Gosh, this whole story just lifts your heart so very much. Thank you for sharing all your feelings; the good, the bad, the everything.

Kayla on June 12, 2008 at 9:49 PM said...

The video was beautiful. I'm with you... Praise Jesus our Lord and Savior.

Lori on June 13, 2008 at 1:13 AM said...

I cried the entire time I watched the slideshow, and when I see "Little Brother Nathan" in person, I will cry again...he is such an adorable, precious little miracle.

Still praising God with you -- and still praying for his continued improvement in his breathing --

-Lori.

Trina on June 15, 2008 at 5:56 PM said...

That little one is as precious as ever! Praises continue to ring from the Hansard family.

Anonymous said...

Amber,
I keep going back to this one. I am still so very thankful to the Lord for His grace and mercy. I hope you all have a great time at Marco Island. Oh...I also love the lipbalm video of our little Em....I think I have watched it now for about 10 times...It just makes me smile..
Love,
Sister Dina and Girls!

Anonymous said...

Amber,
I keep going back to this one. I am still so very thankful to the Lord for His grace and mercy. I hope you all have a great time at Marco Island. Oh...I also love the lipbalm video of our little Em....I think I have watched it now for about 10 times...It just makes me smile..
Love,
Sister Dina and Girls!

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