I sat in the dark right next to you and placed my hand against your chest so I could feel its rise and fall with each breath you took. I felt your heart thumping against my fingers and counted for a few seconds...habit, even when you are well. Before leaving, I brushed your hair to the side just a bit and tucked Tebow under your chin...a series of events that have been repeated countless times over the past 2 years...but this time was different. This time, it all took place on the bottom bunk of your brand new bunk bed. Your big boy bed.There are a few milestones that are a little hard to swallow for a mother as she realizes that her children are truly growing up before her eyes. We push through these milestones right alongside our children with trepidation at first before they become the new normal in their lives. I have always been a little sad to see the kids move from one baby item to a big kid one...car seats, clothes, shoes, bottles, bicycles. And beds. Watching their teeny tiny bodies encompassed in the vast land of a big kid bed for the first time is truly a little sombering to a degree, as it seems to embark a new era in their lives...as a kid. Not a baby.
And this time...well, this time is even more sombering and different. This time, we took the crib down for the first time in over 6 years. It sat strong and bold in the same place in the same room since Abby was a baby, enduring many hours of crying, loads of puke, poop explosions, bouncing, feet climbing in and out, kids falling out (Abby...multiple times), piles of crap shoved under its rails that hid piles of crap so well, teeth gnawing and feet kicking its many rails. And prayers...multiple prayers as we looked over its rails and asked for guidance and instruction on raising such complex and incredible little beings. The crib, taken apart bolt by bolt, was carried up to the attic and stored until we can find a new home for it so it can continue its duty of housing the littlest of little ones.
The end of an era...no crib, no bottles and burp cloths. We are still holding tight to the diapers and pacis for now, but our baby is losing a little bit of "baby" each and every day. He loves his new bed and has made the transition with such incredible ease that makes us truly realize that our baby is quickly turning into a big boy...which means that this chapter in our lives is quickly closing. As I ponder sentimentally about the past 6 years of babyhood in our house, I still can't help but get excited at this next chapter with our three fun-loving big kids.